Stars and me…

I was stepping out of my flat to hit the gym today when I saw Koffee with Karan showing on television. I have never been a fan of the show but it always excited me to see how the guests on the show spoke, behaved, joked, and above all – how they fared in the rapid fire! I was always impressed by how comfortable and camera-friendly these stars were and I used to use their style and presentation to measure where I stand in my “star quotient”. Of course, every time I did measure, I found myself to have NO star quotient at all!

So, this time, it was Abhishek Bachchan and Aishwarya Rai Bachchan! I saw their rapid fire round and left for the gym. On my way to the gym, I thought that it’s not that these guys crack the best jokes or something! I have been more spontaneous and cracked much better jokes!! However, where these guys score is that they are so comfortable with the other stars (who are often a topic of discussion on the show) and so comfortable with this Karan guy that they actually end up putting a good show and walking away as stars who rule the world! It’s all about confidence – something that all these stars have, something that the others lack, something that I for sure lack!! It has been an area of development for me and I am constantly trying to work on it. There are several times when I walk in for an audition and feel intimidated by the other guys standing there. Why wouldn’t I? These are all tall, fair, good-looking guys who are also good performers! It gives me the jitters and often makes me ask myself – Do I even stand a chance? What was I thinking when I decided that I want to be an actor?? However, I fight this thought and somehow get on with it! And that’s pretty much the story of my life right now..I am fighting my insecurities, trying to gain confidence, and hoping that a day will come when I will get past all these stud boys and grab my dream role!

When I saw Abhishek on TV, I thought – I am 25 years old and I am miles and miles away from where Abhishek has reached today. Alright, he is a Bachchan but I can’t afford to take that as an excuse! There is still so much to do!! I am yet to get my first break! As of now, I am just facing a lot of “not fit”s in most of the auditions I am making it to! Becoming a popular film actor is right at the horizon which as of now looks really blurred! 🙁 I need to be a better actor, a better personality, a better something that I am still not aware of! But you know what?!? I am not going to give up! I will fight!! I read somewhere – A river cuts through rocks not because of its strength but because of its persistence!

I want to be that river!! And I will be for sure!! I will learn all the rules of this industry and then devise a way to break through them! Yes, I am unconventional and that is going to be my strength!! I don’t know what I am going to do and how…when I figure out, I’ll let you guys know!! But I will do something!!

Anyways, I just wanted to share some of my insecurities with you guys. There are many many more which every aspiring actor has to go through. However, all of it is worth the effort and it is this struggle that makes life worth living! I often think how boring my life would have been without this dream. Well, let’s leave that for another post!! 😀

For now, I am strong and steady to face the world again tomorrow! I will go to bed with the hope that I will look better, feel more confident, and find my star quotient in the days to come! And then, I am going to kick some serious ass!! 😀

Good night people. Love you all!

The day I saw a legend…

It was 10.20 pm… I had finished rehearsals and was on my way back home… I was doing my routine of standing outside his bungalow for a couple of minutes to feel inspired and motivated.. and finally… finally… I got to see the man!! It was Amitabh Bachchan, in his huge white car entering his bungalow. No driver, nobody else in the car. He was driving himself…looked quite relaxed..must have returned from a long drive..or may be he was just driving down from Jalsa (his other bungalow) to Prateeksha (where he lives, sleeps, writes)!

You know what?!? I was really tired that day since I was in office for 8 hours and then rehearsed for 2 plays. But after I saw him, I instantly got the energy to rehearse for another 48 hours if required! Such is the power of this man!! He has lead a life which inspires one and all! He fell, he stood up. He fell again, and stood up yet again!! We always hear about how the true winner is one who keeps fighting and never gives up! Well, Amitabh Bachchan is the perfect example. He has had his share of flops, bad decisions, accidents, and everything that can screw a person’s happiness! But he fought!! And today, he continues to be India’s finest star actor (very difficult to be both!).

Although Amitji did not see me when I saw him, I quietly said to him – “Hello Sir, you are the greatest man the Hindi film industry has seen! And I hope to work with you soon… And when we do work together, I’ll tell you how much I love your work, how I stand outside your bungalow for a while every now and then because it makes me feel good, how you are the greatest inspiration for any aspiring actor, and (he’ll hate this) how I dream of being better than you some day!!” 😀

Love you Mr. Bachchan! Not matter what the critics say, you’ll be loved by millions and billions and zillions of people 🙂 May God bless you with good health and more love, more success, more opportunities to work with new talented actors who love you!! 🙂

Busy week at Thespo screening…

It was crazy indeed..it always is at Thespo! First, the rehearsals for almost a month to make sure we don’t goof up on D-day. And then the screening with Quasar and Kashin (our honorable judges) staring at us as if they have no idea what we are saying or doing! They hardly laugh at your jokes, they hardly even smile! For one of the plays, Q actually stood up and walked away (to the loo I guess) and came back only during the second act (he left act one mid-way)! Anyways…personally, it was a satisfying experience for me as always. Why? Because I got to perform in 3 plays – all excellent ones, directed by very talented directors!

It started with ‘Afwah’ which happened to me by chance. My friend, Amol Parashar, gave me a call one night asking me to report to him the next morning because he wanted someone to read for a part during the screening. The part turned out to be that of G.S. Chaudhary, a smart-ass cop who finds out that there is something fishy about a social get-together of a few friends who share the second half of their first names with him (‘dar’)! Fun indeed! By the way, I thought Amol stole the show with his energetic, distorted (:P) take on Mahendar! Naveen as Rajendar, the guy who turns deaf, kept people involved and was funny in his deaf acts! Nidhi Bisht was her crazy self and was liked a lot by a certain casting director watching the play! And I must mention that Prabal’s direction and execution of the play as a quick-paced, slapstick fun ride was extremely entertaining and kept me as a member of the audience (my part comes only in Act Two) engaged and excited!

Next up was Evam Indrajit! This was a tough one as we had already taken a risk by choosing a classic! As Quasar pointed out later, such plays always come with their own baggage and we need to be very careful especially if we are gonna f**k with it! We were a bit under-rehearsed, most actors did not know their lines too well, the second-half was untouched, and everybody was nervous since we were doing EVAM INDRAJIT! What helped was that we had Nidhi and Manvi in the audience to cheer us up 🙂 So, when we got on with it, there were cueing problems, actors were forgetting lines (including me), etc. However, the good thing was that the mood was maintained, emotions were in place (I think) and we pulled off a decent show for the time we had spent on rehearsals. It was really bold of Nimish Surte, the director who adapted this one, to have even thought of doing so. The fact that he actually pulled off what he did in the amount of time he had just shows that he will go a long way! Also, Medha as Mansi was cute and sweet and I am sure she is the most beautiful Mansi any director would ever get! 🙂

Finally, the play that I had rehearsed the most for – HOLI! It had a cast of 9 actors (and 4 band members) playing characters that are very different from each other (like the colours of Holi). I played Basant, a guy with a lisp who has issues with his parents and gets rusticated from college for beating up the Principal’s nephew! This play went pretty well I thought but the director, Anuj Rawra, was not too happy with the way it went! That reminds me that I must mention how brilliant Anuj is! His implementation of Holi and his ideas about merging the band with the plot, the opening scene where the 6 characters break through Anand’s door, the final scene where it all comes together were simply… well.. Brilliant! He was very passionate about the project throughout its making and you could see it from the way he was running around on the day of the screening, arranging the sets, pepping up the actors, etc. The actors were all charged up and excited too. As a matter of fact, 3 of us actually got injured during the violent scenes! Exhausting but great fun!! 😀

As much as I enjoyed performing in all of these plays, the best part was the feedback session by Quasar and Kashin after each performance! They rip you apart!! They really do! But as Shweta pointed out, they do it for your own good. I made a note of all the feedback given to each of the plays and I realized that such is the knowledge, experience and expertise of these two guys, that if I use all of their feedback, I can actually come up with a near-flawless play myself! Of course, when I get that play to the Thespo screening next year, they’ll have feedback on that one too..feedback that’ll rip me apart, feedback that I wouldn’t have heard before, but feedback that will teach me a lot and help me grow both as an actor and as a theatre person in general!

It’s sad that the Thespo screening is over and there’ll be no more rehearsals everyday. However, that gives me time to go and hunt for more auditions, do other non-Thespo plays, spend some time with family! If one or more of these plays get through, it’ll be fun to actually take these plays to the Prithvi stage! If not, life moves on…and of course, I have one more year for Thespo..so I’ll try again next year!

Sorry for such a long post…it couldn’t have been shorter! Will try and get some pics of the screening and the festival soon..

Wish us luck!

Lots of love… Cya soon!

Theatre vs Cinema

I often think how I will manage theatre and films together when I become a successful actor (one who has assignments that pay him well!)…

Theatre is so exciting…and marvellous..and spectacular…and…and…so much FUN!!! It’s like oxygen for a lot of actors. On the other hand, there is something (some very obvious things!) about cinema that attract you more as an actor. I don’t know what they are….MONEY…GLAMOUR…JUST THE EXCITEMENT OF SEEING YOURSELF ON THE BIG SCREEN DOING THINGS THAT YOU WOULD NEVER HAVE DREAMT OF…I don’t know! It’s such a huge, wide medium!!

To be honest, as much as I love doing plays and all the little theatre things that I keep doing, I have always wanted to be a film actor! I guess that’s how it is for most aspiring actors. This may be sad…but true!! And I don’t see anything wrong with this. A film career has better prospects and leads to a better life.

I am aware of all the discussion about how theatre actors are true actors and how their way is the right way…blah blah blah…well, how does it matter?!? It’s an art form! Any kind of acting – film, television, or stage – requires a lot of hard work and sincerity. It is wrong to classify one as genuine and correct and another as crap. Take television for example. People say how television is easy money and how TV actors don’t know how to act. I disagree! These actors work very very hard to make the money that they do. They are talented and it is difficult to do what they are doing!

So, Goodluck to all my fellow starry-eyed strugglers (I hate using that word!!). Hang in there…we are the next batch of stars!!! As you can see, the Khans are slowly expiring…and the ones on stand-by don’t seem to be too good 😀

Cheers.

Siddhivinayak saves Mumbai…

A new play I am working on!! It’s about how Lord Ganapati saves the city from a terrorist attack!!

This one is going to be huge!! Here is the link to the website:

http://www.siddhivinayaksavesmumbai.com/

Do participate in the contest…it’s fun!!

The other plays I am working on as of today are:

Once upon a … tiger

Evam Indrajit

Holi

Shit happens.. (tentative name..will change soon)

Ae Bhai Zara dekhke chalo (still being written)

Sound good, don’t they? I hope to see all you guys in at least 1 show of all of these plays!!

Love

Hello world! My first blog!!! Wooohhooooooooooooooooooooooo!! :D

Everyone seems to be blogging these days. I resisted this craze for a while. However, when I thought that it might actually be of help in the future (a lot of people at relevant places ask if you have a blog!! :P) , I decided to start writing..

Don’t expect too much from my blog. I am an Engineer (Electronics and telecommunication) by qualification working in an IT book publishing firm as an Acquisition Editor aspiring to become the next superstar of India! All my posts will be related to one of these so if it doesn’t interest you – Goodluck!! Hope you see me on the big screen some day!! Sayonaara…

For those who are interested in reading this blog – Brace yourselves!!! The worst writer ever is at work!! Hope you get something out of what you will read here…All the best!! 😉

Loads of love.. be good.. See you around!!